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Some Things Never Change

There is a little game people play that has been around since the Garden of Eden. It is called excuses. On television, we've seen athletes, politicians, movie stars, and even presidents use them. It is safe to say we've all used them from time to time. Say, here's a good idea: Next time we use one; lets give the blame to Adam. After all, he's the one that started it. When Eve laid her choppers on the delicious looking whatever, and took the bite that eventually ruined us all, God came looking for Adam and asked him: "Son, did you eat from the tree Itold you to stay away from?" Adam answered: "Sir, it was the woman you gave me." "She done it!" I wouldn't doubt that when he offered up that lame excuse, he still had apple bits on his face. Several thousand years have gone by, and although many folks think they're pretty good at it, the excuses are as sorry as ever. Before I knew the Lord, I thought I was pretty good at it. An old boss once remarked that I was so audacious that I never gulped or blinked whenever I told one of my stories. Another suggested I write a manual of excuses to sell to my co-workers, to make up for the money I was losing by not going to work. I've always suspected, and now even more, that God has a great sense of humor. Never would I have imagined back then that one day I would be on the receiving end. All pastors are blessed in that regard. There was a little devilish pastime some of my ex- work buddies would play. (Not me!) When the boss wasn't in the office, they would pull out the employees' excuse forms from his drawer and read them out loud. And though that was not nice and constituted a federal crime, I must admit that some of them were hilarious. Keep in mind; these were excuses for being late or absent. Okay, okay, I'll share a few random ones. One guy wrote that he "fell off  a letter." Another wrote that he got "stuck in the quagmire." (That one would have been perfect in Louisiana) Another couldn't spell diarrhea so he substituted it with something more blunt. One wrote he wouldn't be coming to work because he was going to be a "pole bearer" in a funeral. I guess if the man that died were Polish, the joke would have been on us. Human tendency hasn't changed, so it is safe to surmise that others still talk about and make fun of our excuses. Now, if you've offered up your share of excuses in your time, don't feel so bad because you're in pretty good company. To name a few, Moses, Jeremiah, and Aaron played this game. In fact Aaron's excuse was uproarious. When his brother, Moses, asked him about the golden calf he helped to create, he said something to this effect: "The people brought me some gold; I threw in the fire, and out came this calf." I bet that years later when they re-called the incident, Moses would roll on the floor and grab his sides laughing. I should add that there are some excuses that are valid. Of course when they are, they no longer qualify as excuses, but reasons. I hate to say this, but lately I've become pretty suspicious of some church people I know. I find it hard to understand that folks can go so many years without ever once getting sick, have no broken alarm clock, no vehicle breakdown, company from out of town, or some other unexplained calamity. What is wrong with these people? Something tells me they're not trying. As for me, this article wasn't better because I didn't sleep well last night.

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